Before my daughter was born, I had no idea if breastfeeding would work for us. It was always my intent to give it a go for many reasons--the nutritional benefits, the cost-saving benefits, the skin-to-skin contact, and so on--but I was okay with the idea that it just might not work.
But boy am I glad that it did.
Though it hasn't been without its challenges (ahem--breast infection that hurt worse than any labor or c-section recovery [I mean, literally the worst pain of my life, as both my husband and mother can attest], milk protein allergy that required a total and complete removal of dairy from my diet), the physical and mental rewards for both my daughter and I have been immeasurable.
Now, before I go any further, I don't want peeps to get the wrong idea with this post. Like I'm some kind of fierce breastfeeding mama who thinks this is the right path for all women and their babies. Because that's just not true. If anything, I am a total and complete advocate for anything that makes the lives of both the parent and child easier--nursing, bottle-feeding, whatever-the-heck kind of feeding that works. It just so happens that breastfeeding was both easy and convenient for my child and I.
Nor am I an advocate for any particular timeframe associated with breastfeeding (man oh man is that an incendiary topic!). Just like I went into the whole process not knowing if it might work, I also went in not knowing how long it might work.
That said, some months ago, when we made it past the introduction of solid foods, and safely into the phase of "people" food combined with nursing, I made it my goal to breastfeed until Chica could transition to cow's milk (at 12 months). I mean, why get so close to the end and then bail for the last handful of weeks, right??? Plus, over this past month, we've easily and naturally weaned down to just wake-time and bed-time feedings, with a small one thrown in before afternoon nap time. Easy breezy, compared to the on-the-hour cluster feedings of the newborn stage!
So, with that one-year goal in sight, I made it a point to really cherish these last few weeks of nursing my child before it's over for good (and she leaves me and goes off to college and gets married and has babies of her own [if that's what she wants for her life]--whaaaaaa!), but I'm sorry to report that we've hit a very disheartening snag:
Biting.
And not just the biting that we worked through at various teething stages. That kind would come and go over a 24-48 hour period (usually when those chompers were causing severe pain).
No, this kind is constant, pretty painful, and quite disruptive to what should be a relatively calm process. I've tried all sort of recommended tricks to get it to stop, but my beloved daughter just keeps on clamping down. And I keep freaking her out by yelping and giving her my stern voice, and then before you know it, we're both out of sorts and just fed up with the whole process.
So...last night, I resorted to formula for the very first time, and it was pretty sad for me, having come so far, with so little left to go.
But it was hard to stay sad for long when I knew that Chica was getting something nutritious in her belly, without the angst that's been a constant of the last few days.
I'm guessing it will be a bit of a guessing game--bottle or nursing?--for the next week or so, before I officially throw in the towel. For example, she nursed well this morning, but bit the ever-loving crap out of me at nap time.
So wish us both patience and fortitude until we make it over this hump. And if you hear sobbing coming from my general geographic vicinity, remind me that she and I have had a good--no, great--run, and that this is all part of the natural growth of a healthy child.
:)
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