Teehee...reemerge and purge sounds hilarious in a not-quite-right kind of way.
But I do mean purge.
Or eradicate.
Vent?
Release.
Discharge (nope, not that one).
Just...get it all out.
So I can move on from this week, gloriously reborn like a butterfly from its chrysalis (poetic, no?).
So.
The headlines--'cause I know you want 'em before I start rambling (keep rambling?):
1. Chica is doing fantastic at school.
2. I have not been fantastic at home.
But I gave myself this week to be heinous. Just to really sink my teeth into all my emotional colors of the rainbow, and then I'm moving onward and upward (scout's honor!) whilst I hope my dear Chica continues to be a kindergarten rockstar.
But back to my heinousness.
Obviously, the main culprit was the big school event--but, I didn't hit me in the obvious way.
Sure, yes, on the second day, when it sunk in after drop off that this was really happening, like, every day, I blubbered like a baby the whole way home, replaying the image of my BABY GIRL scurrying toward the school doors with that backpack that's almost as heavy as she is, without even looking back to say goodbye. I mean, talk about a stab to the heart.
But.
The bigger cause of my violent mood swings this week was the mourning of our non-schedule.
It hurt bad to finally reach the beginning of the end of our collective pre-school age cocoon. And imagine how much worse it would have been, had I not been mentally prepared??
Chica's flown the daytime nest, Chicklet will start Pre-K next year, and Little Man will perhaps join her--or remain not far behind.
And that's just tough.
Gone are the days of completely mastering our own hours. Doing as we want, when we want, where we want. Educating and entertaining and challenging and enjoying all my children at one time, as I see fit.
This is, of course, nothing new for mothers the world over.
But I am an insanely fulfilled stay-at-home Mama to my children, and this kind of major change, with more on the horizon is just, well, an annoying adjustment.
And who likes change??
Nobody, I tell ya.
Of course, my heinous mood wasn't helped by the fact that I assembled a to-do list for this week that was approximately 2,793 miles long.
In part, it was to distract myself.
In part, to exercise control where I could.
In part, because I have a seasonal cleaning disorder.
And finally, in large part because Nanna was here, and when I have extra helping hands, I try to get shite done.
The items I powered through include, but are not limited to:
- A crap ton of flowerbed weeding.
- Trimming all our exterior landscaping.
- Planting a few new things.
- Buying, hauling, and spreading garden soil.
- Spending over two hours at the DMV (on my ever-loving birthday, no less), to renew my license.
- Purging and cleaning the pantry.
- Purging and cleaning our master closet.
- Hauling a trunkload (from the purging, naturally) away for donation.
Along with a boatload of other small and annoying errands that exhausted me so thoroughly that even my eyebrows hurt. Like, really and truly hurt, as I type this.
But.
I got through my list, we got through this week, and we will get through every week and change and challenge to come, just as we always have.
One day at a time.
So, yeah, like I said--I wallowed in the heinous this week, and now I'm done.
And to prove it, I'm gonna be all positive and end with a list of things I actually like about this kindergarten event in our lives.
M'kay? M'kay.
1. Seeing the hubby in the morning.
For so long, we've been ships passing in the night (er, pre-dawn), so seeing him in the morning is a surprise treat. And, it helps to wake up when I know I'll have my buddy there.
2. Snuggling in the silence with Chica.
For some time, the order of kiddo wake-up has dictated that Chica is usually last. But now she's first. And tiptoeing to her room (to give the other two a precious few more minutes of sleep) is the best. I burrow in bed with her and share some much-needed one-on-one time to kick off the day. It's stolen snuggles and quiet convo, and it's the best.
3. Calm breakfast prep.
Chica's now eating solo, before the other two are fully awake, and it's a sweet extension of our wake-up cuddles. Just a glorious, calm experience with this sweet face:
4. The morning carpool drop-off is easier than I feared.
After a couple days to feel things out, we quickly acclimated to a speedy and well-oiled morning drop-off that doesn't require us to get out of the car. So my wee ones can go in their pajamas. Or totally sans pants. Ha. Always a plus. ;)
5. The redistributed attention.
Need I say more? These two beauties now get more of me for more of the day, and I know they will thrive from it.
6. The reunion.
But when that attention returns to a three-way split, they're all sooooo happy to see one another. And sooooo into spending the post-school hours with play-doh, ha. It's our new thing.
7. The playful pick-up.
Though we stay in the car in the morning, in the afternoon, we park and pick up at the special kindergarten door, and the wee ones will likely get the chance for playground play every day during this trek. And that makes them happy, happy, joy, joy.
8. Positive (I hope!) influences.
Though this last one is kind of a bittersweet one, it's fun to witness, so I'll try to not hate it. And that's the fact that Chica's already observing and adjusting. She came home from the first day talking about a girl with pig tails, and guess what was requested the next day?
Yup. It happened. My girl who changes her requested hairstyle once in a millennia is rocking a new 'do.
But look how adorable she is!
Though, let's face it--even if she had no hair, she'd be adorable. ;)
So...to sum up for anybody who's made it through this rambling post: it's been one helluva week, and I'm glad it's capped off with a long weekend.
God has guided us through this new terrrain with only minor bumps and bruises, and I know it will only become our smooth, new normal from here on out.
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